Have you ever experienced a missed opportunity and wondered how did it pass me by? Or, how did I miss that?
Lately, I find myself asking this of every person I encounter- and I know I get lost in my mind often, however, the past six days have been full of such moments where I pause to ask ‘what did I miss?’ every time I engage someone in a discussion.
My friend says it’s the INFJ in me, and sometimes she mentions it’s the Pisces in me, but I am more inclined to her saying that it’s the human in me. Bottom line- it’s frustrating me now because I am unable to focus on my writing- and haven’t read the book I really want to read.
Today was the highlight of my ‘what did I miss moments?’ because a colleague during discussion paused to ask me ‘how do you know what I am going to say before I even say it? And do you know that you really look at people in a way that can make them uncomfortable? Are you studying me…like right now?’
I did not answer any of her questions because unbeknownst to her, my mind was reeling with so many thoughts about my work and community meetings- going over every agenda I discussed and praying that I synchronized my notes using my new Violet Gel pen. My colleague did not press me for an answer and I hope she never will, for it’s dawning on me that I need a time out.
I need time to decompress or do what I always call ‘exhale’ and simply be me- in my own space. So, as I was scrolling through my Instagram feed, I came across something that made me pause:
I have been going above and beyond, pushing myself at work-striving to achieve so much that I slowly forgot to take little breaks, to compliment myself, note the little things that I did right along the way…and now, my mind’s overwhelmed and calling for a break, a much deserved break.
It’s my hope that by acknowledging this I would be in the frame of mind I feel I need to make it through every day and also not to judge myself harshly for missing social cues or snippets of energies from people I interact with.
Indeed, it’s the little things that make an impression, it’s just we often see the forest and applaud nature but forget to single out the trees.