nilichoandika

Reading The Top 10 Reasons the Rich Go Broke by John MacGregor

June 10th, 2020

Hello wet, cold, chilly and muddy Wednesday! I should probably get out of bed and pour myself another cup of coffee, but having made three trips to the bathroom in one hour, let’s put the coffee on hold until I’ve finished writing this.

How are you?

How are you really holding on wherever you are?

I traveled back to Mbita- a 3 hour drive away from Kisumu, to see to the implementation of the projects we had initiated before the Corona shutdown, and now that I am back, I can’t say I’ve been out and about- because there are still measures in place- the physical distancing, wearing of masks, washing of hands and simply making sure there is little physical contact and it’s hard especially with communities in the rural areas where I work. They saw me and wanted to hug me, greet me and some were inviting me to their homes for meal-and I truly missed such connections. It was even harder reminding them that there was still the need no physical contact to help curb Corona.

So, I settled down from Monday and started reading The Top 10 Reasons why the Rich Go Broke. I truly need to manage my finances and from March, the stringent measures taken worldwide to deal with Corona showed me that one; I had no emergency funds, surviving from paycheck to paycheck is like walking on broken glass, and I definitely have to develop and invest in new modes of income.

Respect what you do, earn enough to be careful where to put it.

The author talks an crippling internal weakness we all share which he defines as the B.E.A.R Trap: Beliefs, Excuses, Actions and Results

He asked a simple question that’s got me thinking about our education system and it’s given me ideas to explore and actualize. This question was “why do we have so much trouble understanding money?”

He goes on to share the 10 reasons we give that lead to traps that affect our finances and each chapter is dedicated to exploring these factors. Trap one was my absolute favorite “Stuck on the Outside,” because no matter how hard we try, when I look all around me, it’s the one trap we all fall into. Doing everything for the Gram! Trying to catch up with others- buying stuff we don’t need to please people we don’t know.

This is another gem I got from Netgalley- and now I have 12 more titles in different genres to read and enjoy.

And, I’m big on those phrases that spark something in me, some of the few that got me thinking herein were:

The cost of an item isn’t simply what it’s sold for, but what it costs the owner to own.

True change can occur only when a person is able to acknowledge how their BELIEFS mold their EXCUSES which manipulate their ACTIONS that opens the avenue to a sincere desire to make change for better RESULTS.

So, what’s your story when it comes to money?

My take on this:

I would however advise that no reader should be fooled by the title. This book does not talk about billionaires or mention any of them as case studies, but rather it focuses on you and me- and if you have access to money and you think you are not rich…then that belief right there would make you miss out on some pretty good advice here.

You can get a copy from Amazon: here

About the author:

John has been a leader and innovator in the financial services industry for over 25 years and his true passion is helping people understand how easy it is to live a financially secure life if they have the right mindset and process in place. John is the Founder & Executive Director of ThrivePath – The Revolutionary Process to Financial Freedom and Peace of Mind. He is the author of The Top 10 Reasons the Rich Go Broke: Powerful Stories That Will Transform Your Financial Life… Forever, The Ultimate Guide to Selecting a Financial Advisor, Unlock Your Money Code – Master Your Mind And Live Your Rich Life and The Legacy Book – What To Do Before Your Loved One Passes.

To work with John visit https://www.johnmacgregor.net/
Table for Two

June 7th, 2020

I once heard the moon say that only the sun knew her secrets,

Get your face mask on.

I’ll slip a bottle of hand sanitizer in my purse,

Meet me outside, under the mango tree,

Carry your bluetooth speaker,

Let’s listen to my playlist.

I’ll set a table for two.

Stardust, I’m asking, would you like to have coffee with me?

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Hope

June 5th, 2020

Never count sand in the morning,

You’ll never get past the first grain you behold,

And in so doing, the sun will go to sleep and so will the sun within you.

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Never count the lashes they give you,

Your scars will always remind you of how many times they broke you.

Never hold onto the bile in your heart,

It may spread into your soul and once that goes dark,

death looms and there is nothing as worse as the death of the soul while the body still lives.

Never let those who choose to see you kneel before them break your spirit,

Rise up even if it’s one toe at time,

Rise up Child,

For your spirit is from those of old, eons of prosperity and pain, and you only heard of what the phoenix could do, but have you ever asked yourself what the Sun’s been doing every day?

You are it, Child, so fight for it, forgive to heal and rebuild, fight…

Hope.
Friendship and Proverbs: Reading When the Apricots Bloom by G.N.Wilkinson

June 1st, 2020

About the book:

Inspired by her own experiences stationed in Baghdad during Saddam Hussein’s rule, former foreign correspondent Gina Wilkinson’s evocative, suspenseful debut is told through the eyes of three very different women in Iraq at the turn of the millennium. A secretary, an artist and a diplomat’s wife, each must confront the complexities of trust, friendship, and motherhood under the rule of a dictator and his ruthless secret police…

In a perfect world, we could wait until the apricots bloom. Alas, the world is not perfect.

Rating:

I saw this book on Netgalley and I had to request the publisher to read it because I was drawn to two things on the blurb: the fact that it’s set in Iraq during Saddam’s reign and the second aspect involved three different women. I asked myself what could a secretary, an artist and a diplomat’s wife have in common?

The story delves into the need for control by Saddam’s government, enforcing rules and corrupt police officers who demand that people do as they ask and if they do not, someone close to them or simply the people themselves disappear. The diplomats are also spied on by the Iraqis and the police visit anytime to glean information from the Iraqi spies- mostly in their homes, reminding them of the hold they have on them.

As the story begins, the author introduces us to both Huda and Rania, as young girls who take a blood oath to always protect each other’s secrets. As the story unravels, Huda comes off as the one who would go to any lengths to protect her family, including blackmailing her former childhood friend, Rania, and it does not help that she is also working for the police as an informant- giving details of Ally’s life.

A secret is like a dove, once it leaves your hand, it flies where it wants.

In reading this book, Huda was ice cold towards Rania and you could not help but wish that she could take a step back and soften towards her friend. Rania on the other hand is the artist, both wise and calm and she knows when to push and when to refrain. What I found oddly satisfying was that both women had suffered the loss of their loved ones at the turn of Saddam’s reign, yet their approach towards this loss was utterly different. Rania was warm towards people while Huda was aloof. Her words could slice you open.

Ally, the diplomat’s wife, is noted as ‘housewife’ on her Australian passport- but her coming to Baghdad is not just to support her husband, Tom, but it’s to find out about her mother- a child’s last hope of trying to put together the pieces of her mother’s life. She starts asking questions and soon learns that in a dictatorship, your words could make you or kill you, literally.

I love proverbs and sayings and I came across many of them in this book, some that stood out are:

A lie takes only one moment to leave the mouth, but it can linger to the grave.

Sorrow sweeps everything out of your house violently, so that joy has space to enter.

A friend knows better than an enemy how to do you harm.

The story of these three women is both nostalgic as it is heartbreaking and it reminded me of the countless number of lives that are affected in war-torn countries, countries facing civil unrest, and more so dictatorships.

This book is also beautifully written that you cannot help but urge Huda, Rania and Ally on, in their quest and their friendship.

About the author:

I’ve been a nomad from the age of six-months, when my parents packed me and our Siamese cat into an old Renault and set off for a remote gold-mining town in Australia’s Nullarbor desert. Since then I’ve circumnavigated the globe many times. As a foreign correspondent, I reported from some of the globe’s most intriguing and dangerous places for renowned broadcasters such as the BBC, NPR, and the ABC.

Visit her site: https://www.ginawilkinson.net/
Rain

May 31st, 2020

I once heard the moon say,

Every time a soul is wronged, Heaven weeps,

Her words crawled the length of my spine,

I asked, “How can we tell that heaven is weeping?”

The moon smiled at me, and when I looked back at her,

She said, “Look outside Child, don’t you see heaven weeping?”

http://www.pexels.com
Still At Home: Updates on life amidst COVID-19 quarantine measures

May 28th, 2020
It’s a Thursday and no, that right there is more for me than it is for you. I lost track of days and dates towards the end of last month and I’ve struggled to keep abreast of such details because a part of me knows that I’ll be resuming field duty in a week or so.

There’s been a lot that has happened since my previous post on staying at home, and on top of that list is that I stopped working out.

Yes, at some point, I got exhausted by the routine house chores that doing jumping jacks, planking or doing squats never went well with me. I was sore, so I stopped working out, and the result is that I am chubbier than usual and my Mom approves!

So, let’s get into my life’s updates:

On writing: I started working on In The Quiet and I have been closely sharing updates with my Mentor on this novella, hoping to release it in July.

On reading: I should probably stop adding more books on my galley, but it doesn’t help that Netgalley has so many new releases every hour or so- and I cannot resist a book that I am drawn to. I have so many to read by next week:

On special life events: Yesterday was my Mom’s 60th birthday and it was such a joy to see her smile, dance and enjoy such a milestone. I was even more happy that I got to share in her day. My favorite part was getting a slice of the Cake!

On keeping sane: I have been taking naps and a break from writing when I feel like it and my sleep pattern’s altered drastically. I write from 10am to around Midday and prepare lunch for the family. I take my naps sometime between 2pm and 3pm, if not I watch a Nigerian movie because Mom and I can have a laugh at this!

I finally sleep at 2am and the cycle continues. Oh yes, and Kisumu is hot so taking cold showers helps and these have risen to 3 or 4 depending on the work I do in the day!

What I’m looking forward to:
1. Staying healthy- with the World Health Organization saying that we may have to continue living with the Corona Virus, I find myself both fearful and eager to get back to work. My kind of work involves constant communication and touch with communities so I have to take more safety measures to ensure I am of good health to keep working.
2. Writing some more
3. Finally putting the pieces of my 2020 writing goal of joining and participating in a community of writers. I’m already loving the #WritingCommunity on Twitter, and I am looking forward to joining another here in Kenya.
4. Replacing my passport. I would love to travel some more and experience different cultures around the world.
5. Being aware of my access points- I was watching a sermon online and the preacher said something about access points- being more like the weak links where we let anything and everything in and this wounds us and it’s key for us to take charge of what we consume holistically to lead better lives.
6. Working out consistently. I hope I get this done!
Have an awesome week wherever you are and I’m sending you love and positive vibes wherever you are. May you be a light, receive light and give light in all your endeavors.
In the Quiet

May 24th, 2020

“There are traces of him everywhere I look, and sometimes, when no one is watching I magnify a trace- like the time he was staring into space,lost in thought, or that time while we were watching Teen Titans with the kids and he asked ‘have you ever wondered if this life is worth it?’ and I asked ‘what? How?’ and he shrugged and said ‘ I’m just thinking out loud.’

Then some traces become the air I breathe like how he would sigh every morning before going to work, and how he’d stay in his car for an hour every day when he got home.

Was it me? Then I realize it wasn’t about me, it was never about me and to try and even make it about me, takes away from him, from the pain from the suffocation he felt. Life choked him. How painful was that for him?

Will I ever know?

And when everyone tells me Em’s, ‘sorry for your loss‘ I want to throw it back at them ‘sorry for yourself, let me be’ So, I stay in the quiet of my confusion and anger, and try my best to stifle the anger because all I’m left with are questions and nothing kills faster than the “what if?” questions and they are the kind that surround me.

I stay in the quiet…sometimes, the truth lurks in there.”
Written in the Stars

May 23rd, 2020

We end where we ought to have started,

You and I,

We start where we ought to have stopped,

You and I,

And when the world feels just right, we stir up trouble,

“Who were you chatting up at midnight?”

“What do you mean chatting up? I was asleep…”

“I was on WhatsApp and you were online…”

“Yes, just because I am connected to the internet, it does not mean that I am actively engaging with people on my phone.”

“Yeah, that’s what you all say…”

Courtesy: http://www.pexels.com

I hang up and sip my coffee,

Listen to a song or two, hold my breath, feel the beating of my heart.

You call and call until I give my phone a much needed break ‘airplane mode,’

You and I,

Oh, how is it that an action amplifies one person into a multitude,

You and I…like on such a night,

I feel like we are written in the stars, but we strive to prove the universe different,

Yet here we are…written in the stars.
Flowers in the Evening

May 16th, 2020

Your love is like receiving flowers in the evening,

A solace after a rough day at work,

Fresh scents that remind me of the things I cannot control,

It’s living, believing, in the evening.

Your love is like the sight of flowers in the evening,

I am not a fan of red roses,

Like passion and lust they’re cliche,

They’re like empty promises, appealing, way too enticing but never actualized.

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No, your love is like an assortment of flowers,

Wild, spicy, pretty, bland, bright, dull, ever present…

It’s living, believing and it comes in the evening.

Your love is like quiet smell of the evening,

A reminder that everything is fleeting,

And everything can be deceiving.

Your love is the evening,

It envelops me into submission when I am exhausted,

It takes when I am still,

It gives when I am famished,

As silent as the night, as loud as the fears that come alive,

Your love is not like, never has been like, rather it is the evening.

So, Stardust, are those flowers you sent in the evening, just for me?
Hold me while you wait

May 13th, 2020

You come to me in waves,

I know not to flee for when I do, your scent assails me wherever I go.

You come to me on your terms and sometimes,

Just sometimes…I wish I could wake you up.

I wish you cared a little more,

I wish you would have told me this before,

So, I would not try to cage you…to grasp you in my hand, in the comfort of my palms pressing closer, drawing the life out of you.

They told you a man had to stand his ground,

They told you not to let me have my way with you,

So, you chose them over a quiet dinner with me,

You chose them because it felt safe not to be mocked by them.

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So, I brought down the walls of the cage I had set up for you…

I took one step back, then two, then three and when you were not looking, I ran.

I did not catch my breath,

17 missed calls…12 texts, 8 missed video calls,

I ran because it was safer to be miles away from you than to stay and let you treat me as your status dictated.

Now, here we are…you are a shadow of yourself and I have no regrets.

You want to speak of everything now, you want to pour it out but at the gate of your heart lies this barrier, the one that still calls me the villain, and I see it in your eyes

Hold me while you wait, hold onto me while you wait,

Maybe…just maybe, you’ll one day find the courage to live on your own terms,

Now, here we are, you are a shadow of yourself and I have no regrets.