Tag: life lessons

February going into March

February 28th, 2020
I am ready for March! It’s my birthday month and I am here for it simply because I hope I can catch a break from being in my feelings and out in the field.

In line with this, I thought I’d share some of the insights and experiences I gained in February. When it comes to reading, some of the titles I enjoyed reading this month are:

Some of the articles I’ve enjoyed reading include:
- The Mo Ibrahim Index of African Governance: I was particularly drawn to their report on “Agendas 2063 & 2030: Is Africa on Track?” because I work closely with public primary schools in improving infrastructure with the end goal of seeing to increased attendance of pupils in schools while improving the quality of education. I was sad and not surprised that the quality of education has since 2014 reduced in Africa.
I am also in love with Tarot readings and this new obsession/fascination has had me closely following three wonderful humans:
On writing: I reached out to the publisher who saw to the production of copies of SIFUNA, to have my books ( Fire, Water, Wind & Earth) printed for the readers here in Kenya and we are still working around the costs and number of copies.

I know it’d be a great read this April.

The progress on my latest work, “Zuri: The Chronicler of Enzi” is taking longer than I’d hoped and this is my fault because I killed my main character and the villain and now I don’t know what to do with the story. I have not written anything for two weeks.

My favorite song in the month of February:

Life lessons learned in February:
1. Rest, eat well and most of all, rest…you can’t get anything done when you are worn out.
2. Do not take things personally…if you do, you’ll be bogged down by the wrong things everyone has done against you and that is a heavy burden to bear.
Books I’m looking forward to reading into the first week of March:

So, that’s it for now, I truly hope I can clear my mind, get some much needed rest and focus on writing and making the much needed updates to my work in progress.

Have a lovely weekend,

Stay safe. Live. Love. Laugh and Call the people you love 🙂
Monthly Wrap Up- January 2020

February 2nd, 2020
Hello February!

I loved January…and where it seems like it felt like a century for everyone, it rather breezed by me and now that I think about it, it was simply because I was doing lots of planning, meeting various school communities and prepping for February.

So, now I’m dreading February because everything I had been planning in January has to be actualized in this first week and precisely between the 4th and 7th!

So, looking back at the events of January, some of the things that stand out for me on:

Reading:

I got and read 8 books in January. These are the 5 titles that got me thinking afresh, so, if you’re into poetry, then Break Your Glass Slippers by Amanda Lovelace is a must-read for that 21st Century spin on Cinderella and self worth!

On Writing:

I struggled with the point of view of my work in progress. Torn between writing in the 1st and 3rd points of views had me re-writing the whole manuscript and if you’ve been following this blog closely- you may have read two chapters of it. [Zuri: The Chronicler of Enzi]

One of my writing goals for 2020 was to join a writing community and also engage with many more writers and so far, I’m learning a lot more through the #WritingCommunity on Twitter…like how to create an animated book cover…so, I tried this:

To celebrate the start of February and get me focused on writing more, I bought some stationery…let’s just say 2 sets of a dozen pencils each, 3 sharpeners, 1 eraser and 2 cute stick notes.

On the blog:

I love how some of the content I post here just comes to mind…and some of my favorites to create and share were:
On Music

I listened to a lot of music this past month because of how late into the night I had to work on most of my projects. So, in no apparent order, I’ll just share some that I kinda loved…or had on replay

[From top left- clockwise: Awake by Hillsong, Fine Line by Harry Styles, Songs for You by Tinashe, Sweet Insomnia by Gallant, Always in Between by Jess Glynne, 8 Letters by Why Don’t We]

It feels like there’s a lot more for me to do this month and I cannot help but feel like it’s going to be great, and I am opening up to all the endless opportunities coming my way this month.

How’s your February looking?

I feel like this is my get up, get moving and strike that off your to-do-list month! So, here’s my quote for this month with regards to work:
Staying on Track: What happens when your plans go South

January 22nd, 2020

It’s nine days to the end of January and I am already dreading February!

I have loved this month because I’ve seen the projects we envisioned late last year come to fruition. New permanent classrooms and smiles on kids faces because they get to enjoy studying in well ventilated, spacious and solid classes!

Seeing kids this happy about studying in such a classroom is the motivation I need to keep doing what I do. #workdiaries pic.twitter.com/gdiQujUU40

— Archie Okeyo (@herhar) January 20, 2020

I intended to write more so I could have the final draft of my next book done by February but that won’t be happening. I think I killed the villain, and in her place another one sprouted and I don’t know what to do with her! So, this turn of events has thrown me off balance- and being a planner, I am frustrated to the point of not being able to align my thoughts to writing anything else.

What do you do when things go south?

I have had tea, taken a walk along the Lake, had some fresh mango juice, taken a nap, done some push ups (awful ones!), listened to my playlist on shuffle, set aside the draft…all these within a week and I still can’t get myself to calm down and get back to writing!

One of the greatest highlights of my day has been reading “Break your glass slippers” by Amanda Lovelace

My favorite lines…

“create a safe space

for yourself to go to when

it feels like the whole world

has turned against you.”

I am struggling to stay on track, trying my very best to follow this through and maybe going with the flow would help see to the completion of this draft, maybe not.

I guess I’ll not know unless I try…

Have an awesome week!
The Nile

October 13th, 2019

You, son of man, are a thing to behold.

I could call you a beauty, and you would shrug it off, for the world has taught you that ‘beauty’ subscribes to the feminine.

I could call you a gem, and you would shrug it off, for the world has taught you that ‘gem’ subscribes to anything that will get you feminine appreciation.

You, son of man, are a thing to behold.

In you lies beauty, gems and abundance.

In you lies greatness, conviction and chaos…for light and dark are solid.

So, I lie here, watching the rise and fall of your chest…counting days, moments, memories unknown to you.

If I were good with a pencil, I’d sketch you,

I’d curve you using this piece of lead, emboss you on a piece of paper, show you off on a wall, for the world to see.

I do what I can with words, so you reside in them.

You, son of man are a thing to behold, and when you rise to get yourself a glass of water, I see it, the weight of the world on your shoulders, running down your back like The Nile.

pexels.com
Home

October 8th, 2019

I’ve traveled the world,

Soared, sailed, trekked, biked, driven…I have.

I’ve traveled the galaxies,

Loved, hurt, broken, wounded, scarred, indebted, promised, cherished…I have.

I’ve seen you,

Oh, you who chose to stay when everyone including me, left.

pexels.com

How is it that you smile given what you’ve been through?

How is it that in your scars dwell more light than in mine?

How is it that you who has been shattered dare comfort me, without hurting me?

How?

You smile, oh, Beauty, and say…”I have been through it all, will still endure some more, but the one place I’ve learned to make habitable is my home. I carry my essence, my being, everywhere I go, so no matter what comes my way…I’m always home.”
It’s the little things

September 12th, 2019

Have you ever experienced a missed opportunity and wondered how did it pass me by? Or, how did I miss that?

Lately, I find myself asking this of every person I encounter- and I know I get lost in my mind often, however, the past six days have been full of such moments where I pause to ask ‘what did I miss?’ every time I engage someone in a discussion.

My friend says it’s the INFJ in me, and sometimes she mentions it’s the Pisces in me, but I am more inclined to her saying that it’s the human in me. Bottom line- it’s frustrating me now because I am unable to focus on my writing- and haven’t read the book I really want to read.

Today was the highlight of my ‘what did I miss moments?’ because a colleague during discussion paused to ask me ‘how do you know what I am going to say before I even say it? And do you know that you really look at people in a way that can make them uncomfortable? Are you studying me…like right now?’

I did not answer any of her questions because unbeknownst to her, my mind was reeling with so many thoughts about my work and community meetings- going over every agenda I discussed and praying that I synchronized my notes using my new Violet Gel pen. My colleague did not press me for an answer and I hope she never will, for it’s dawning on me that I need a time out.

I need time to decompress or do what I always call ‘exhale’ and simply be me- in my own space. So, as I was scrolling through my Instagram feed, I came across something that made me pause:

I have been going above and beyond, pushing myself at work-striving to achieve so much that I slowly forgot to take little breaks, to compliment myself, note the little things that I did right along the way…and now, my mind’s overwhelmed and calling for a break, a much deserved break.

It’s my hope that by acknowledging this I would be in the frame of mind I feel I need to make it through every day and also not to judge myself harshly for missing social cues or snippets of energies from people I interact with.

Indeed, it’s the little things that make an impression, it’s just we often see the forest and applaud nature but forget to single out the trees.
10 lessons learned this August

August 30th, 2019

It’s the second last day of August and can I say that 99% of me is screaming with joy because schools open in two days and that means your girl will be out and about initiating dialogue and meetings to set up infrastructure in public primary schools.

This means a lot of travel, field work, engaging diverse views and most of all, it means that I am closer to my purpose- seeking to positively impact the quality of education children get today, one school at a time.

This month’s been an interesting one. I lost three of my friends this month and it goes to show that life is as precious as you live it.

So, I thought of wrapping up this month with some of the most memorable experiences I’ve had this month.

1. I experienced varying degrees of emotion when it comes to love, attention, and intimacy.

If you can please watch this video. It’s one the talks that spoke to me in my phases.

2. My experience one, shared above, led me to check out Esther Perel and after her insights on Red Table Talk, I have watched most of her talks on YouTube, trying to reconcile my expectations versus reality when it comes to love.

3. It is possible to go without coffee for 21 days. I repeat, it is possible to go without coffee for 21 days, but the struggle means consuming a lot of tea and in my case, I had at least 3 cups of black tea every day.

4. Everyone wants something.

5. Everyone you meet has a whole lot to offer it depends on how you approach and engage with them.

If you think you know it all, chances are you know nothing at all and sometimes when you are seated at a table, negotiating terms and working around policies that would impact livelihoods, it’s best to engage silence.

6. There is something exhilarating about taking online classes.

I took 2 courses on +Acumen on: Adaptive Leadership and Environmental Sustainability Practices.

7. People call it a ‘Bucket List’ but Emica Mao, author of, Plus One Plus None, calls it “Do-While-You-Can-List.” So, whatever it is to you, write it and pursue those things relentlessly!

8. We regret the things we don’t do more than those things that we actually do.

I learned this when a colleague approached me with the latest office gossip, and given that I was the heroine of this tale, she chose to tell me that people were saying I was having an affair with one of our associates (who is married). I listened as she spoke and when she finished I asked her ‘is that so?’ and did not say anything after that. In fact, I haven’t said a thing since then and it hurts me that this tale, founded on a lie, hurts me to date. I wish I told her off.

9. Fear is good sometimes, it keeps us going.

I struggled writing my latest book, Sifuna. I wrote it, released it and then de-listed it and edited it and just cast it aside for three months, until this August when I shared it with a couple of readers. It feels good to get positive feedback especially after struggling with a story for so long. It’s more like ‘I’ve still got it.’

10. I’ll end this list with two words ‘stolen kisses.’

I am looking forward to September and what it brings. Hoping to grow more into my own and travel some more.
Galaxies

August 27th, 2019

I am having one those days where my mind’s unsettled by matters unclear to me. I’ve come to love such days. Where no sleep means time to write, to ask myself ‘what if?’ and churn a story out of that, some dark, others silly but all of them in need of editing.

It’s two minutes to five o’clock in the evening as I type this sentence.

I have had three cups of milk tea and two mandazis. The sun is in her glory outside so I am seated on the floor typing away, using words to make it through this feeling I have.

Have you ever been in love?

Have you ever been in love whilst asleep only to wake up shuddering at the level of mockery your mind would make you endure whilst reality jolted you back into facts?

I yearn for such vivid dreams. Maybe they’ll come my way, however, if they do come your way instead of me, be a darling and write about it, at least I’d read something thrilling.

Have you ever made something, shared it and then thought, no- this need work and then shelved it again? I have started editing Sifuna and cannot wait to have it published this year in Kenya.

unsplash.com

I thought I was a galaxy, but the mood I am in today only serves to remind me how wrong I was to think in singular whilst I dwelled in plural, so now I am changing my outlook, I am going to sit here and listen to the sound of my heart beating- remind myself of every cheerful memory my mind can conjure up and maybe then…just then will being galaxies make sense to me.
Updates on the 30 New Ideas Challenge for this August

August 8th, 2019

August is my “try new things” month. I came across this idea by watching one of the TED Talks on challenging yourself to try new things every day for 30 days.

So, I made a list of some things I wanted to do on this cool LCD slate I got last week:

So far I managed to get the first one done, writing using my left hand:

I’d love to watch a TED Talk every day of the week, build up on what I know, gain some inspiration and challenge myself to test out new ideas, so my video of the day has to be: Adam Grant’s “The Surprising Habits of Original Thinkers.”

I listened to a new song, new artist to me- and it was Mabel “Don’t Call Me Up.”

I danced along too 🙂

While taking this challenge, I am learning that there are things I do and some that are easier to write or dream about but not to implement, like number 2: wake up at 5am.

I struggled with this, mainly because I work till 2am and find myself waking up at 8am, working out for 5 minutes [ 30 Days Fitness Challenge App, thank you] and having a cup of tea to go.

Writing 300 words daily of two manuscripts has been an uphill task, and I am forced to prioritize one story over the other while still jotting down ideas that could build upon the other as I move along. This is one new thing I am not giving up on. I can write more than 300 words a day, and can definitely have content for two manuscripts at the same time.

So, out of my list, I’m done with numbers 1, 3, 5, 6, 10.

Score: 5/12

In going through this list, I noticed that most of the stuff I did are things I’d love to do daily, so after a week or so, they’ll cease to be new or a challenge to me and I also noticed that I am yet to step out of my comfort zone and pick something that truly challenges me.

How’s your August? Any ideas?
I Lost Me When I Found You by Miss T.N.King

August 7th, 2019

Once in a while, you experience moments that call you out or bring such clarity in your life that you cannot help but sit back, reflect and change your path.

I came across Miss T. N. King’s book, “I Lost Me When I Found You” on Netgalley last week- and I wanted to read it, because for a while there have been blurred lines in my understanding and experience on love, with love and for love.

About the book: Have you ever lost yourself? In a candid and inspiring call to action, Miss T.N. King invites every woman who has felt depleted, hopeless, or “not enough” to reconnect and uncover her true, divine self—known as her Inner Goddess.Throughout this book, King exposes the “idols” we create in our minds and the lifestyles we use to distract ourselves—which leave us feeling lost and empty. She breaks down exactly how this happens and how we can transform our pain, fear, and setbacks into power, faith, and success.

King shares details of her personal journey, as well as the stories of several courageous women, and provides practical, proven tools to truly elevate us and our quality of life. Miss T.N. King shines the spotlight on relationships, career, money, body image, social media, the “superwoman” complex, women bashing on other women—and even “situationships”!

I loved the format of this book, first are the stories shared by other women “I lost myself when…” and you can actually relate to their situations. Then come the insights drawn from the Bible, the author’s experiences and famous people’s experiences and finally a call to action and those keys for reflection are amazing. This book would be great if it came with a journal. Some of the things that stood out for me were:

1.

A common mistake I notice us women make is that we stop loving ourselves when we start loving a man.

2.

In order to get something you’ve never had; you have to do something you’ve never done.

3.

What happens when you settle for a situationship? You end up becoming the “New Side Chick”- a woman who has decided to stay by a man’s side after he had expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words and actions.

And finally my favorite:

Be attracted to the way a man treats you, before you are attracted to anything else about him.

If you’d like to read the book for more insights, you can visit Miss King’s website http://www.misstnking.com/ and pre-order a copy of the book on Amazon currently priced at $9.99

Picture courtesy of Miss King’s website.

I’m glad that my 30 day new challenge for August has been sparked by reading this book and I made a list of things I love about myself and then another of things I wish I could change about myself and why-and looking at the two is my next step of action.

Can’t wait to see what this new challenge brings me.